Three pillars of life

Three pillars of life

Sunday, June 24, 2018

Life hack - Ego problem


The definition of EGO is the drive to maintain and enhance favourable views of one-self.
Almost everyone has some sort of ego. Ego is on e of the characteristics of the human being. Ego is good for the construction of our personality and living in the society. As a person tries to maintain and enhance favourable views of one-self his/her bond with other members of the society becomes strong.
Trust is the main component that binds the society together. Human being has long ago understood the benefits of living in the society. So to maintain the trust human beings have developed the ego. Ego doesn't let a human being deviate from his behaviour. The problem starts when his behaviour is not good for him or someone else or in short against the total good.

Let me give you my own example of how I got in to trouble because of my ego, got out of the trouble and used my ego as an advantage. (Remember my tagline?? – The power is when- you use ODDS to get EVEN.)

So here is my story- I started investing in share market since I was in college. I was getting good returns. So I decided to not join a job and continue investing full-time. After about 1 year my parents were thinking as I am investing in share market full time, I must be earning a lot. So they started to ask me to bear more and more part of household expenses.
But my earnings were just enough to bear the expenses and there was nothing left to reinvest. In investing you need more money to get more income. (I was getting respectable returns over my investment at that time in percentage terms.) I got frustrated. One day a good friend of mine asked me what's the problem? I told her the above story. She casually said, "Why don't you join a job then? You are an engineer and you would definitely get the same amount of salary as much as your expenses. No need to draw money from your investments and you can grow your investments side by side. And by the way, soon or later you have to marry, so you can't escape the household expenses."
I was dumbstruck. I thought why I didn't thought about it? (I am one of those 99% people who think they have above average common sense.. :P ) Her logic was impeccable. On thinking I found out that, I was subconsciously thinking that people will perceive my joining a job as failure of my share market investing. It was my ego, which was preventing me from doing a logical thing. It was just to prevent misunderstanding of the people. But in the long run this ego is going to do more harm than good.

So I refocused the attention of my ego from the road, to the destination. I thought it is not important which road you are travelling as long as the road is ethical, but the destination is important. There are some roads which we think are going to the destination but we later on come to know that the road takes us to somewhere else, or the road is blocked, then it is the time to change the road. No need to attach your ego to the road, but attach it to the destination you want to reach.
This also creates the same favourable views in the society we live. As I changed my road at the right time I am now at a much more comfortable financial position. My goal of early retirement is in my sight.

This solution of shifting the ego from road to destination is useful in every aspect where ego is involved, for example if you want to improve the relations with someone then don't stick your ego to I'm not going to say I am sorry to him/her, instead think- I am going to do whatever it takes to improve relations with that person. Changing a road is not as bad as we think it is. Also don't make early opinions about those who change their roads.

Your comments on this subject are welcome.

You can use your common sense to enhance your experience of life. Spreading this awareness is the goal of samanyabuddhi.blogspot.com .


See you later.. Until then have a great time...

Sumit,

The POWER is when,
You use ODDS,
To get EVEN.